This is a simple song about a matriarchal miracle,
We mean it to be loving and a little bit satirical.
Today we join together in a mood that's celebrational
To honor a great lady who for us is inspirational.
Our story starts some years ago in lovely Philadelphia,
When Jean and Ed were blessed with twins, so lively and so healthy-a.
Now everyone considered these two little girls identical,
From ribboned hair to stockinged feet to dresses sentimentical.
Although, as twins, the little girls had many similarities,
From babyhood both sisters had distinctive personalities.
So Foxie grew, and Brownie too, and played and fought as sisters do,
And Ed and Jean were proud to be the parents of such progeny!
Now when the twins were barely six, fair Jean announced that something new
Would soon emerge to change their lives, and as they watched, her belly grew.
And pretty soon the twins were sure their Mom would be forever swellin',
Then she left, but soon returned, triumphantly with little Helen.
Now Edwin Schloss excelled in everything that was artistical,
But, truth be told, he never mastered many things statistical,
Though Wharton bred, he had a head more tuned to music than to stocks,
And with his brother Harold, found their business headed for the rocks.
So Jean and Claire put up their hair and turned to cleaning up the mess,
And soon they found a ready market for a certain kind of dress.
The families moved in together, Harold, Ed, and Claire and Jean,
With Carol, David, El, Jan, Holly, this was quite a lively scene.
The years went by, and one fair day, from Oak Lane School they graduated,
Everyone was very proud, and Jan and El were quite elated.
Men were calling on the phone, the lovely twins they sought to woo,
And Jan and Ellie had their pick of every handsome German Jew.
But Jan and El were not yet set to settle down with mice and men,
So Janet turned to brush and paint, and Elinor to ink and pen.
Then one fine day, a soldier strong whose name was Oscar Meyer Stone,
Entered into Janet's life and quickly thrilled her to the bone.
"Let's wed," he said, "and seize the day, unless I cannot get my leave."
So borrowing a wedding gown, Jan wondered should she dance or grieve.
But lady luck would have the day; the happy pair were quickly wed,
And then the world turned upside down, as war reared up its ugly head.
The postwar years were blessed ones, beginning with the birth of Bon;
Davie followed close behind, and life continued smoothly on.
For Eagle now, young Oscar worked; to Dallas often he did fly,
Selling every kind of shirt to please the most discerning eye.
At Fox Chase Manor, Jan took hold, a model mom in every way,
She painted pictures on the walls to make the kids a place to play.
A few years later Rich was born; to Kingsley Road the family went.
Now the family was complete; the years rolled by, the time was spent.
They spent some lazy summers on the hot and steamy Jersey shore;
In winter with the Wikler kids the little Stones would play some more.
The children had a happy life; their mother taught them how to be
Smart and funny, brave and bold, and masters of their artistry.
But 'ere the kids were fully grown, a tragedy befell the clan,
For Oscar died before his time and Jan was left without her man.
Though devastated, Jan went on, with courage healed her heavy heart,
And soon she earned her family's bread by teaching little children art.
Time went on, and Janet learned that loving hearts were gifts she'd earned;
With spirit strong and open arms, Jan was cherished for her charms.
Although the children moved away, their hearts and minds were always Jan's,
And soon a generation new emerged to join her many fans.
We love you Jan, we think you're tops, we wish you happiness and joys,
We thank you now for all you've done for all your many girls and boys.
We wish you happy birthday, Jan, and now we'd really like to say
That you are such a major part of everything we are today.
We find ourselves back here again in fairest Philadephia;
A few of us are wiser, and a few a little wealthie-a.
Our gratitude to Steve and Lee for opening their lovely home,
And more thanks to our orchestrator brother, who is Richard Stone.
Now look around, let's raise a sound of joy and offer a barucha
As we revel in the present company of this meshpucha.
We ask that you join in with us with four short lines as we conclude.
Just read the words and sing the tune and contemplate this multitude.
Let's gather round to toast a truth that surely is empirical,
The blessing that is Janet Stone, a matriarchal miracle.
And now let's go and have some fun, at last our little song is done,
It's time to eat and drink and swim and frolic in the summer sun!